Jane Child Did It Better, But Doesn’t She Always?

April 14, 2014 / Posted by:

Kendall Jenner’s LOOK AT ME gene is strong and her fame whore mentor Kim Kardashian taught her that if she makes herself look like a huge asshole everyone will blog about it (I know, I always hate myself for falling for those pack of whores’ tricks) and she’ll become a trending topic on Twitter, so she wore a jumbo nose ring and earring chain to some Coochella Lacoste party yesterday. A reality trick who probably doesn’t know 99% of the bands there paired with a Lacoste coconut and a touch of cultural appropriation is the equation that equals Coachella.

Pimp Mama Kris’ future prized ho is doing the most and is trying to hard to snatch away Vanessa Hudgens’ Try Hard Queen of Coachella floral and bindi-encrusted crown. So she put on a nose ring chain that’s got me singing (to the tune of Diana Ross’ “Reach Out and Touch”), “Reach out and yank some trick’s nose ring, make this world a better place…” KenDULL is 18 and when I was 18, I looked like a dumb mess (and yes, I typed that as a grown up while wearing a He-Man t-shirt and bleach-stained cut-off sweat shorts), but even I knew not to try to replicate Jane Child’s signature look. If the children of America learn one thing it should be to not try this:

janechildbetter

Here’s more of KenDULL and that other one at Coachella on Saturday and Sunday. Those “American Horror Story: Coven collection by Anthropologie” outfits….. Stevie Nicks saw those pictures and immediately torched her entire closet. She’s only going to wear khakis and cotton t-shirts from now on. KenDULL ruined black lace for her.

Pics: Instagram, Wenn.com, Splash

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