Night Crumbs

April 10, 2014 / Posted by:

Panty Creamer of the Day: 23-year-old cougar fucker Aaron Taylor-Johnson on Men’s Health. But seriously, I thought Men’s Health was supposed to be soft-core hotness for gay and straight lady eyes. Why is he wearing so much fabric on his body? – Lainey Gossip 

Scary Spice’s twerking ass looks like two twenty pound bags of sugar bouncing around in the back of a pick-up – Drunken Stepfather

Wait, so I’m supposed to believe that at one time Goopy Paltrow’s marriage to Chris Martin wasn’t a WASPY, cold, un-loving relationship used to boost her public image? – Celebitchy

Woody Harrelson’s side piece in True Detective gets naked in a pool for Vanity Fair and why do I have a feeling she’s peeing in there? – The Superficial 

Well, if Backdoor Farrah really wrote her erotic novel by herself, then her 5-year-old daughter can read it now since it’s probably all two-syllable words and stick drawings and is about as erotic as chicken pox – Reality Tea 

Michael Assbender’s Ian McKellen impersonation sounds more like Yogi Bear with laryngitis – Towleroad

Teri Snatcher still exists – Hollywood Tuna 

In other words: Nerds are having a lot of babies – Jezebel

Demi Lovato leaked Demi Lovato’s nipple pic – IDLYITW

Simple lot lizard elegance is Kate Hudson’s peach pumps and jean shorts – Popoholic

Selena Gomez fired her parents as her managers and while she’s at it bitch should fire herself for constantly jumping back on Justin Bieber’s toddler ass – ICYDK

Cum gutters galore – The Berry 

And in the corner of a dark, musty basement somewhere, someone is fapping themselves raw to this night terror-inducing GIF of Emma WatsonPajiba

Kristen Stewart looks like a Skid Row roadie on his day off – Popsugar

A bearded Australian comedian just put Miranda Kerr out of a job – OMG Blog

The Girl Meets World trailer is um…errr…needs some Feeny – Just Jared

Kate Gosselin is still banging the help as Seal would say – CDAN

I think I’ll wait until 23 Jump Street when Channing Tatum will inevitably give Jonah Hill a salad tossing – SOW

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