Lady Gaga Tells Paps To Photoshop Pictures Of Her

April 8, 2014 / Posted by:

Wait…so you’re telling me Lady Gaag is a phony faker? Color me a shit-shade of shocked! According to Page Six, Gaag’s message of loving yourself just the way you are is a bunch of born this way bullshit, because she get’s final say over the pap shots that are released of her, and all of them get the Kardashian treatment (Dear Adobe: go ahead and change the name of Photoshop to Kardashian, since it’s pretty much just a tool to make vain whores look like expensive fuck dolls now).

An insider claims that at an event last week, photographers were told to “Smooth out her jaw line and thin her arm,” and “Smooth out and thin her legs”. And if they didn’t comply, Gaag threatened to sneak into their house in the middle of the night dressed like the child catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and kidnap their children (I guess?) Page Six also says that only one photographer, Kevin Mazur, had exclusive rights to shoot Gaag’s shows at the Roseland Ballroom, and that he claims his Photoshopping will be “very minimal”. Hahahahah! Good one, Kevin Mazur. Let me know the next time you’re at The Chuckle Hut, I’d love to hear your whole set. But seriously Kevin Mazur, using the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills as an example, just how unbelievably fake will Gaag end up looking?

Here’s more of Gaag performing the final show at the Roseland Ballroom (which will now be known as the Rotten Rose and Weave Room until the day it’s demolished) as well as her arrival, and exit after the show. Maybe if the paps are feeling kind, they can also Photoshop Gaag’s wig to not look so much like Sigmund the Sea Monster (it’s not fair to Sigmund).

Pics: Splash

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