The Human Barbie Is A Child-Hating Racist

April 7, 2014 / Posted by:

If you knew about this plasticized anime alien mess and forget about her, I apologize for bringing her back into your nightmares tonight. If you have no idea who this plasticized anime alien mess is, I apologize for introducing her to your nightmares tonight. Valeria Lukyanova is the Ukrainian creature who looks like a hybrid of a Barbie and a jointed snake toy, and got a lot of attention for being one of the only living things that can make Kim Kardashian look human by comparison. Valeria does herself up like a CGI porn alien and believes she can travel out of her body. Michael Idov of GQ went to the Ukraine to interview her ass and he shockingly learned that a trick who looks she escaped from Area 51 and has gone days where she only eats air (“Me too!” – Posh “Me three!” – Goop) is a total crazy bitch. Who knew?!

Valeria spit out some shit that’s not that crazy (example: she hates kids), but then she said that bi-racial people are killing the true definition of real beauty. Jade the bi-racial butterfly just spread her wings and flew on over to the Ukraine to shit on her.

On why she’s against race-mixing: “For example, a Russian marries an Armenian. They have a kid, a cute girl, but she has her dad’s nose. She goes and files it down a little, and it’s all good. Ethnicities are mixing now, so there’s degeneration, and it didn’t used to be like that. Remember how many beautiful women there were in the 1950s and 1960s, without any surgery? And now, thanks to degeneration, we have this. I love the Nordic image myself. I have white skin; I am a Nordic type—perhaps a little Eastern Baltic, but closer to Nordic.”

On how the only thing she’ll ever give birth to is a giant bundle of fucking crazy: “The very idea of having children brings out this deep revulsion in me. Most people have children to fulfill their own ambitions, not to give anything. They don’t think about what they can give this child, what they can teach her. They just try to shape her according to some weird script—whatever they couldn’t do in life, like becoming a writer or a doctor. Or some woman who’s almost 30 and thinks no one needs her, she says, ‘Oh, I’ll have a kid. He will love me and become my reason to live.’ And then this kid becomes a soccer ball she and her boyfriend will kick back and forth. I’d rather die from torture, because the worst thing in the world is to have a family lifestyle.”

On if she’s a feminist: “I’m against feminism. But what would you keep the children for? So they can get you a glass of water when you’re on your deathbed?”

The hell is Prussian Blue Barbie even saying in that last quote. I’ve seen CAPTCHA sentences that make more sense than that shit. Bitch has no idea what feminism is and who wants water on their deathbed? If I’m on my deathbed, I want booze, bitch. Water being your last drank? That just goes to show you how crazy this mess is, because that’s full crazy.

And Mel Gibson’s irises just turned into two heart shapes and his eyelashes are fluttering like a dove’s wings, because he has finally found his one true love. But she’s still not going to blow him before Jacuzzi, because this crazy bitch only puts air in her mouth.

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