Miley Cyrus’ dog Floyd was killed by a coyote last week and two days later her mama je’e Tish Cyrus bought her a new dog she named Moonie (after the Cyrus’ family’s signature spirit “moonshine,” I think). Everybody deals with the death of a dog friend differently. Some hos like Miley grieve by taking in a fluffy new friend and dramatically cry sing while clinging to a giant replica of the dog that was killed. Other hos like me grieve by screaming out, “I WILL AVENGE THEE,” before covering ourselves in raw meat to lure out the coyote who killed our dog friend so we can fight it to the death (and probably end up in its stomach next to our dog friend). Moonie Cyrus is on tour with Miley and last night they came out of a hotel in NYC together. Miley tweeted that she’s torn about getting a dog so soon after Floyd went off to heaven.
Well, if Miley isn’t ready to wrap her heart around another dog again, she should give Moonie to someone who will love him, cherish him and raise him as though he’s one of their own. I’m talking about the canine on Billy Ray’s head.
Actually, now that I think about it, I wouldn’t be surprised if Billy Ray’s Benji hair is Moonie’s biological mother.