Kaley Cuoco Says Getting Fake Tittays Was The Best Decision She Ever Made

Coming from someone who moved a dude into her house after knowing him for 2 hours and had the date of their wedding tattooed on the back of her neck, I’d say that’s a correct statement.

The May issue of Sorority Newz (aka Cosmopolitan) featuring Kaley Glencoco is still days away from being released to the public, and yet 99.999% of it has already leaked online, probably by Kaley herself. And here’s one more fact about the Jennifer Aniston for a dumber generation (that really says a lot) that you didn’t know before. According to Entertainment Tonight, Kaley admitted to Cosmo that when she was 18 years old, she decided to go under the knife and have two sides of a Pogo Ball inserted into her chest, an act she now considers to be the best decision she ever made. Really Kaley? Even better than your decision to reach for the stunt queen stars with a PR showmance?!?

She doesn’t elaborate on why she decided to get tittays, but I’ll guess/assume it was for work, since it’s practically a requirement in Hollywood to be injected with some kind of clear chemical, whether it be titty juice, Botox, or syringes filled with vodka (a procedure known as The Lohan). And I sort of like that she’s not ashamed of her decision to get a pair of bought-and-paid-for double Ds at 18. I wish I was proud of any decision I made at 18; unfortunately, the best I can come up with is that I’m proud I didn’t go through with legally changing the spelling of my name to Ali’sinn (oh, but I came so dangerously close).