Behold, The Portrait That Morrissey Will Hang Over His Fireplace

March 30, 2014 / Posted by:

As part of their never-ending campaign to make the peasants think that they’re just like them, Duchess Kate and Prince William released this picture of them looking like a wholesome, normal, everyday family who’s just hanging out in their everyday, normal house. Except their everyday, normal house is a damn palace, two of the people in this picture are future Head Moochers of England and it took 4 ladies-in-waiting 5 hours to get Duchess Kate Breck Girl beautiful by brushing her hair with silver combs and it took 4 men 3 hours to perfectly polish Prince William’s bald spot and creeping hairline. The Windsor genes have gone into overdrive on Prince William’s face, because his physical transformation into his daddy is over halfway complete.

But the real stars of this picture, which was taken by Jason Bell, are Baby Prince George and Lupo the dog. Lupo has a look of fear in his eye like he knows that he’s sitting before the future King of England who can have him sent to the gallows for shitting on the rug or pissing on that sharp as fuck christening gown. Lupo looks like someone’s giving him a surprise prostate exam. Wait, wait, where is Prince William’s other hand?!

This portrait is pretty basic and looks like some shit you’d see in a frame at CVS, but it could’ve easily been taken to fiery levels of YES with just one simple photo bomb:

princewilliamduchesskatedogphg

Now THAT is a royal portrait.

Here’s PHG, Duchess Kate and Prince William wearing some boring ass royal clothes while going to the wedding one of their fancy friends today in Chippenham, England.

Pics: Splash

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