The object of every Ghoulie’s wet dream, Miley Cyrus, posted two pictures on Instagram last night of the crying yellow pussy emoji she had tattooed onto her bottom inner lip. It’s only slightly less classy and tasteful than Ke$hit’s “Suck It” lip tattoo and a lot less classy and tasteful than the “Cum Here” lip tattoo that a delicate flower I knew in NYC had.
Just like Billy Ray Cyrus’ music career, lip tattoos start to fade away after a year or so, so Miley will only hear questions like “Um, bitch do you want some industrial-strength Abreva for that toxic jungle ass cold sore you’ve got?” for the next 365 days. It looks like a hybrid of the emotionally raw screensaver pussy she performed in front of at the American Music Awards and the creepy giant crying bear from the Sochi Olympics. Miley’s now got TWO sad cats on her body! She’s got one sad cat on her bottom lip and the sad cat on her crotch who cries out all the tears when she strangles it with a high cut leotard.
And since Miley’s supposedly going through her “bi phase” right now, I have a feeling that tattoo won’t be the only disappointed and sad pussy on her mouth.