Open Post: Hosted By Macklemore’s Toilet Seat Song

March 12, 2014 / Posted by:

The grown Fantastic Max has already tackled important issues like marriage equality (see: Same Love) and the economy (see: Thrift Shop), and now he’s making a very important public service announcement to dudes who don’t lift up the toilet seat before they piss and don’t wipe it down afterward. (WARNING: If you don’t want to know what Macklemore’s bladder juice looks like, don’t press play on that video.)

I grew up in a house with 2 bathrooms and 3 women, so I learned really early on that every time I pissed with the toilet seat down, they’d all get one step closer to kneeing me so hard in the crotch that my peen would retract into my body and I’d have to piss out of my butt. And I’d have to sit down on the toilet to do that. So from then on I just pissed in the sink. It’s easier that way and I don’t have to strain my hands by lifting up toilet seats and shit. I’m joking. I’m not that disgusting. I piss in the tub instead.

And this goes without saying, but Macklemore will win the Grammy for Best Rap Song for this.

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