When I was a kid, my friend had this shifty, mean bunny rabbit with pink eyes and every time I put my hand in his cage to pet him, bitch would show his teeth before biting me. I was dumber in the brains then, so I put my hand in his cage several times even though he’d bite at me every time. So thanks, Bob Costas, for opening up that childhood wound by giving me that picture.
Here I was thinking that Bob Costas’ Sochi Olympics pink eye came from him scratching his eye right after fingering a Russian hooker in the butt. But Page Six says that Bob Costas’ pink eye situation was born from botched Botox. Bob Costas wanted to be camera ready beautiful for the Olympics, so before he went to Russia he got shot up with that Nicole Kidman syrup. The bad Botox job didn’t only screw with his eyes, it screwed with his job too, because he had to sit out for a few days. Some source said, “Bob’s eye infection was due to botched Botox. This isn’t the first time he’s had it.”
A spokeswhore for NBC says it’s not true.
I have no doubt that Bob injects crap into his forehead that’s as synthetic as that toupee on his head, but I don’t think Botox does that to eyes. If getting your forehead shot up with suspect Botox gave you pink eye, half of the hos in L.A. would walk around with eyes looking like a cat’s prolapsed anus. That’s just good old-fashioned pink eye and I’m sticking with the hooker b-hole theory, which makes me wonder why Matt Lauer didn’t get pink eye too. Hmm, Matt probably uses finger condoms.