Somebody Stole Half Of Lindsay Lohan’s $75,000 Fur Coat

January 30, 2014 / Posted by:

Over 5 years ago, Lindsay Lohn stole some chick’s $11,000 fur coat at 1Oak in NYC and last night somebody stole half of Kleptohan’s $75,000 fur coat at the same club. Oh Karma, I love it when you wink while blowing an air kiss at LiLo.

TMZ says that naranja-faced LiLo partied at 1Oak in NYC last night and she wore a two-piece fur coat worth $75k (so I’m guess it was originally worth $200k before LiLo dropped its value by wearing it). A quick second after LiLo left the club, she realized that she only had half of the coat and she immediately went back in to search her table for the other half. It wasn’t there. She called pretty much everyone who sat at her table to ask them if they had the other half and none of them did. The only dude LiLo hasn’t asked yet is some Seahawks player who was sitting at the same table as her.

My guess is that one of three things happened:

1. One part of the coat sacrificed itself for the other part of the coat. Part 1 gave up its freedom so part 2 could live a Lohan-free life. Both parts re-enacted the “I’ll never let go” scene from Titanic before part 2 crawled out of the club and got away from LiLo forever. Part 2 is now searching the subway stations for discarded hot dogs and dead rats to eat. But at least it’s free. At least it’s free.

2. LiLo stole it herself and plans to collect the insurance money.

3. The Seahawks player took it after he learned that the Super Bowl Asian hooker ring that LiLo and White Oprah were running got busted. He was afraid he wouldn’t get his deposit back so he took half of the coat for collateral.

It could be any of those, but I’m hoping it’s the first one and I’m hoping that part 1 gets away real soon and reunites with part 2. It’d be so nice to have a story with a happy ending.

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