As expected, Diana Ross’ son Evan Ross and the hairy bow tie on his chin asked Ashlee Simpson to be his first wife after only a few months of bumping taints. Ashlee said yes, because what else does have to do? Bronx Mowgli’s mother twatted out this picture of her showing off her coochie-shaped ring and them looking like members of a cult you do not want to join. This shit is probably going to last about as long as Ashlee’s role on Melrose Place 2.0 lasted, but Miss Diana Ross is not taking any chances. She’s shaved her head, changed her name and is planning to move to a commune somewhere in Eastern Europe, because she’s not about to spend her holidays slapping Papa Joe’s hand away as he tries to play grab ass with her son. Miss Ross is not on this planet for that.