Mimi must’ve already been booked to sing at a memorial remembering Gaddafi, because Dennis Rodman was the one who sang Happy Birthday to Kim Jong Un at a basketball game between former NBA players and the North Korean team today. That tall drink of trash followed up his rambling disaster of an interview with CNN yesterday by singing out a crappy, busted version of Happy Birthday to his favorite, little murderous, psychopath homegirl. Dennis must really be tight with Kim Jong Un, because he didn’t even try to sing on key and he shrugged his way through that entire song. If I had to sing Happy Birthday to a maniacal, insane dictator of a country that is known for punishing people who don’t show over-exaggerated emotions, I’d sing that shit like I was in a booth with Ike Turner. I’d sing that shit like the spirit of Nippy took over my vocal cords. I’d sing that song as if I was naked and a pack of wild, hungry dogs were waiting to be let loose on me if I sang a wrong note.
And if you’re wondering who won, the North Korean team did. But really, in a game between North Korea and Dennis Rodman, there are no winners.