And Selena Gomez And Justin Bieber Are Back To Doing This Again

January 4, 2014 / Posted by:

Noted anti-Bieber Taylor Swift immediately went on Amazon, ordered a dozen clues (and a few boxes of Penicillin) and sent them via Amazon Drone to Selena Gomez’s front doorstep after pictures of Selena and Justin Bieber Segway-ing down The Fuck Are You Doing Road were burped up the Internet yesterday. Well, Taylor Swift better send a dozen more clues to Selena’s doorstep, because early this morning Jelena (Side note: Typing the word “Jelena” causes your brain to immediately tell your body to begin dry heaving) pulled a move they pulled last year when they posted a pic on Instagram to let everyone know that they’re scissoring each other again. Justin spit up this little note with the pic:

Love the way you look at me

There’s so many terrifying and ridiculous things going on in that gross picture. Let’s go over just a few of them:

1. Justin Bieber looks like a 13-year-old ingenue in a direct-to-VOD horror movie who’s trying to look pretty, demure and scared while hiding from the killer in a closet.
2. Selena’s head looks like it was cut out from another picture and pasted onto this one.
3. The Biebs obviously typed that note while looking in a mirror.
4. That arm around his neck is not squeezing tight enough. SQUEEZE TIGHTER!
5. The most terrifying thing of all is that Selena is actually looking at that smegma-covered, travel-sized dildo with a look of love.

There was a blind item recently on Blind Gossip about some pop star type who canceled her tour because she’s addicted to the bad shit and it’s obviously about Selena Gomez. I didn’t totally believe it until now. It’s obvious that Selena is addicted to the worst kind of bad shit of all: Justin Bieber! Taylor, come get this girl and drag her ass to Promises.

Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >