Night Crumbs
Sean Penn and Charlize Theron might be doing it for real. I’m still waiting for the news that Charlize Theron was recently in an accident where she lost her damn mind, brain and the ability to make good decisions – Lainey Gossip
Ryan Seacrest holds a massive open call for beards in St. Barts – The Superficial
Okay, okay, but is that Droopy Dog Vicki from The Real Housewives of Orange County behind Simon Cowell? – Drunken Stepfather
Glum cunt is a glum cunt and fighting with his own family now – Celebitchy
Quentin Tarantino suddenly feels like an unaccomplished failure – IDLYITW
Florida should regularly drop liquid antibiotics from the sky anyway, but now they really should since a Kartrashian might infect them full-time – Reality Tea
Morrissey is writing a novel, which will probably be 400 pages of nothing but “death to the royal cunts” written over and over again – Towleroad
One of those Teen Moms is in a bikini – Hollywood Tuna
I won’t believe this until Khloe Kardashian is carrying a half Wookie, half human child on the cover of InTouch – CDAN
Maria Menounos’ ass in a bikini: here it is – Popoholic
Lacey Chabert got secret married to her sister?! – ICYDK
If you dropped a quarter or a few in the Kickstarter cup for the Veronica Mars movie, here’s what your money did – Pajiba
This is a surprising development to anybody who doesn’t know that everything in Backdoor Farrah’s life is about as fake as her chichis – Jezebel
Dolphins really do know how to party – OMG Blog
In related news, Lorde exploded from David Bowie throwing words of praise at her feet – HuffPo
I’m guessing this is exactly what a regular Kardashian bikini wax looks like – SOW
And the night was ruined when Adam Scott found out that The Hammaconda got out and ate all his popcorn – Just Jared