Unlike the social media-addicted Eliza Dooley of ABC’s new comedy Selfie, I don’t really put that much of my life online, but I do love lurking other people’s lives on social media. I’ve spent whole afternoons scrolling through other people’s selfies and cat pictures and — well, mostly selfies and cat pictures.What can I say? I love looking at pictures of OPP – other people’s pets (I think Naughty by Nature has a song about it). Acknowledge your demons, right?
However, I think it might be a bit out of control, because recently I met the owner of one of the cats I lurk on online and it got all kinds of weird. I was at a party and started talking to this person I lurk on social media, but I didn’t tell them this because – DUH – that’s creepy. So I pretended like I didn’t know them or their cat, Señor Pants. Everything was going fine, until they told me that they had just adopted another cat, I responded by saying “I know.” Then I made matters worse by trying to backtrack and saying “What I mean is, I know that you just adopted a cat, because you’ve got that new cat glow about you.” New cat glow? That’s not even a thing!
Clearly I could use a break from social media, so I’ve decided to take part in ABC’s Selfie Social Media Cleanse. On September 16th, I’ll see if I can go without “liking” pictures of other people’s pets for 24 hours. Can I do it? Maybe. Will I experience symptoms of withdrawal? Probably. But if someone as selfie-obsessed as Eliza Dooley can try to stop counting the “likes” on her smartphone, I can go 24 hours without searching for hashtags like #dogsstealingpizza (oh god, how will I survive without videos of dogs stealing pizzas?!?).
Do think you could you use a break from obsessing over social media? Whether you’re posting 40 bathroom selfies a day or just spending most of dinner creeping on your friend’s photogenic Tabby, we could all probably use the #SelfieSocialCleanse. Hopefully the owners of the 47 different corgis I follow won’t post anything too cute while I’m gone (“Sorry, we don’t know how to be anything but adorable” – Corgis).