Here’s human bag of muscles Kellan Lutz and Miley Cyrus (dressed like a Central Florida lot lizard who gives handies for half-smoked Parliaments) getting off of the same private plane today in Miami. The photo agency I got these thrilling pictures from say they were in the Bahamas together. Hit the “NEW COUPLE ALERT!” alarm. Just because two famous whores get off of a plane together doesn’t mean that they’re licking each other’s b-holes. They could be doing the rich ho version of carpooling by sharing a private jet.
I’m sure that during the flight, Miley twerked on her bong and periodically took tokes through her asshole (Side tip: Do not try that. TRUST me. Your b-hole will want to devour an entire bag of Funyuns afterward) and Kellan Lutz lifted heavy things the entire time so the muscles on his muscles on his muscles didn’t deflate.
If Kellan Lutz is ever photographed with slimy tongue yeast smeared all over his mouth, then we’ll know for sure that Miley is sucking on his face.