Afternoon Crumbs

December 18, 2013 / Posted by:

Behold, the elegant, exquisite, natural, relevant and regal version of Kim Kartrashian, Wonky McValtrex and Lindsay BlohanHollywood Tuna

All those people who watched Katy Perry and John Mayer sing their boring duet at Barclays in Brooklyn must’ve been on Red Bull and speed, because how did they not instantly fall asleep like Rusty the Narcoleptic Dog? – Lainey Gossip

Is that Mike from Shahs of Sunset behind Carmen Electra or just his sexier and tangier twin? – Drunken Stepfather

Why doesn’t Bill O’Reilly and the rest of Fox News get off Santa’s whatever-color-ass and investigate the Easter Bunny’s shady dealings, because you know that bitch is a shifty one – Towleroad

You keep running with that football, R(apist). Kelly, but hopefully that touchdown is on another planet and there’s no underage girls on the way there – The Superficial

Put on your post-apocalyptic wig and get in the bunker, because God is going to throw a million lighting rods at every Target on the planet in about a second – Celebitchy

Maybe Sheree can hire Porsha Stewart to be the estate manager of Chateau Sheree? Porsha is dumber than dry dirt, but taking care of three pieces of plywood and a handful of nails can’t be that hard – Reality Tea

File this under: things I didn’t know I needed in my life – OMG Blog

Excuse me while I change out my eyeballs and pretend like I didn’t see this – IDLYITW

Lorde wants you to know that she isn’t a slut shamer – ICYDK

“Do I have to order from the kid’s menu again?!” said Casper Smart as JLo threw a judgmental look – Just Jared

SAVE ORLANDO!!!!! – Jezebel

I just watched Macaulay Culkin eat a slice of pizza for over 4 minutes. What have you done with YOUR life? – Tosh.0

Another baldie’s joining the  Willis family soon – Popsugar

Beyonce’s album has hit the 1 million mark on iTunes – HuffPo

This video would be a billion times better without the kids, the wife and the hot dad’s pajamas – The Berry

Charlie Sheen and his first love, crack, are back together again – CDAN

Vintage Will FerrellSOW

What kind of vato hooker shit is Fergie wearing? – I’m Not Obsessed

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