Hot Slut Of The Day!

December 12, 2013 / Posted by:

Karen Perrin, the senior assistant from DC who Shawshank’d her way out of a bathroom after being trapped in that bitch for 8 hours.

Karen Perrin was finishing up some travel stuff for her boss until 10pm last Friday night and before picking up her purse and getting out of there for the weekend, she went to the ladies restroom. Karen did her thing, washed her hands and when she tried to open the door, she found out it was locked. Karen didn’t know what to do and she quickly panicked, so she went back into the stall, walked back out, washed her hands again and tried to open the door one more time hoping that it was all just some waking dream. But the door was really locked. I don’t know why in ILLEGAL hell that bathroom door locked from the outside, but it did.

Karen told MyFox Philly that she’s claustrophobic, so she panicked from the beginning thinking that she would be trapped in there for the entire weekend and would have to survive on tap water and toilet paper sandwiches. (“Eh, that’s more than I eat.” – every model) She tried to dismantle the lock from the inside and that didn’t work. She tried to kick in the door and she broke the handle, but the door stayed shut. Karen shoved paper towels through the door hoping that security would see it on the camera in the hallway. They didn’t.

Afraid that she’d have to sleep on a paper towel pillow on the floor, she stepped it up and tried to escape out of a hatch in the ceiling, but that plan was a bust. Karen told ABC News that’s when she thought about the Shawshank Redemption. It gave her a new plan. Karen used the door handle and a long rod she found to bust through the dry wall next to the door. After two hours, Karen made a hole big enough to put her arm through and turn the handle. She was freeeeeee! Karen said:

“I was crying. I felt like I was escaping a bad dream, like when you have a nightmare and you wake up and your heart is pounding and you realize, ‘Oh, I was just dreaming. Did that just happen. Am I OK?’”

Karen called her husband and daughter and they came to get her ass. Karen is taking a few days off to recover from this TERRIFYING HORRIFIC ORDEAL!!!! Morgan Freeman saved her! Morgan Freeman really is God!

Yes, this is news. No, not just local news. This is national news. As it should be, because hopefully the makers of 127 Hours will see this heroic story and turn it into a feature film called 8 Hours (starring Octavia Spencer). The world needs to see this harrowing tale of a woman’s will to not spend her entire weekend at her goddamn job.

On a different note, what kind of human doesn’t take her phone to the bathroom with her? How does she entertain herself? This is 2013!

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