Afternoon Crumbs

December 4, 2013 / Posted by:

That jealous bitch Sunny Obama took out a little white girl at a White House holiday party after that little girl showed up with almost the same hairdo as her. But that little girl gets the game point, because she didn’t even let go of her handbag.   – Jezebel

The GOOP-ing of Jay-Z: He and Beyonce are going vegan for 22 days. So that means no oats for the Arabian horses she gets her weave hair from  – Lainey Gossip

Cover up that FUPA, you fatties! – The Berry

Orlando Bloom and Liv Tyler might be bumping elven genitals – Celebitchy

Conan found the one good thing about the Kartrashian Khristmas Kard – The Superficial

I think Chestica Simpson’s chichis ate her neck – Drunken Stepfather

Some writer at a Moscow tabloid says that Vladimir Putin is more like Vladimir Puto – Towleroad

Hayden Panatroll might not have brought her titty cleavage but she did bring grandma’s favorite placemat and wore it on her torso – Hollywood Tuna

The placemat that Hayden Panatroll is wearing will go great with the napkins and tablecloth that’s on Christina Ricci’s body – Popoholic

If a 1994 prom dress from Contempo Casuals and the rug section of a JCPenney mated… – IDLYITW

And now for something to kick you in the soul: Paul Walker died from a combination of traumatic and thermal injuries and Roger Rodas died from multiple traumatic injuries – ICYDK

I’d rather drink Giggy’s piss than drink Lisa Vanderpump’s sangria – Reality Tea

Lady CaCa’s Mona Lisa poncho looks like a blanket you could buy from the back of a van in the parking lot of a Home Goods – Moe Jackson

Duchess Kate and Prince William go out for a casual dinner at Olive Garden – Popsugar

But that picture of a topless Cindy Crawford and a tired dog……. – Just Jared

The Dancing with the Stars producers are smoking, snorting, injecting and butt chugging the wrong stuff again – Pajiba

It’s nice to see that The Grudge girl is getting work in commercials now – Videogum

Martin Bashir resigns from MSNBC after saying that someone needs to caca in Sarah Palin’s mouth – SOW

IN THIS ECONOMY: Keira Knightley recycled her wedding dress – I’m Not Obsessed

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