Kongrats On The Kute Kouple Of Kids That Kame Out Of Your Krotch, Kim!

November 25, 2013 / Posted by:

Sometimes you’ve got to give credit where credit’s due: Kim Zolciak makes a gorgeous pregnant woman. I can’t believe I’m starting a story with a genuine compliment. I’ve probably had a stroke. Pray for me? Or at least send a helper monkey.

Kim Zolciak’s babies can finally upgrade their status from ‘tardy to the party’ to ‘arrival at party’ (who’s writing these jokes today, my mom?) because Kim popped out a set of twins this morning. Usually when you’re writing about a former Real Housewife and a set of “new twins” it’s implied you’re referring to a whack tit job. But not this time! This time it’s BABIES!!! Kim and her hot young piece Kroy Biermann announced the birth of a baby girl and a baby boy via Instagram, where she also explained the babies names:

“The twins names are:
Girl: Kaia Rose (After ‘Psychic’ Rose who is like a grandma to me and been a huge part of my life for 13 plus yrs) Also the twins were born on the Rose’s birthday!
Boy: Kane Ren (Ren After my OBGYN who has delivered 5 of the 6 kiddos, who has also been a big part of my life for 12 yrs and we simply adore him).”

This brings their family’s K-name count to 6: along with Kaia and Kane, Kim and Kroy also have sons named Kroy Jr. and Kash Kade. You’re flying dangerously close to the sun with those K-names, Kim. Did you just hear that? It was the sound of Kris Jenner furiously drawing up a cease and desist letter. That, or it was the sound of Kris calling up Bruce and demanding he fuck 4 more babies into her wrinkled womb. “Two can play at this game, bitch! Get ready to meet Kordeila, Krocodile, Kristal, and Kim Kardashian II!”
SHARE
Our commenting rules are pretty simple: If you make any overly offensive comment (racist, bigoted, etc..) or go way off topic when not in an Open Post, your comments will be deleted and you will be banned. If you see an offensive or spammy comment you think should be deleted, flag it for the mods and they'll be forever grateful and give you their first born (although, you probably don't want that).

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >