Afternoon Crumbs
For being a woman whose job it is to make food look delicious, Martha Stewart is a master at tweeting food pictures that look like a disgusting scene where an abortion, an exorcism, a horse bukkake party and a mass cyst-popping happened at the same time. It’s a GROSS thing. – Jezebel
Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger’s title as Canada’s royal couple is safe, because Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams are probably not bumping fuck parts again – Lainey Gossip
No disrespect to Walter White/Malcolm’s dad, but Bob Newhart did it better – The Superficial
And in about five seconds, the feds will confiscate the Hermes plate Teresa Giudice bought NeNe Leakes as a wedding gift – Reality Tea
In related news, China has no idea what the definitions of “gay,” “erotic” and “god” are – Celebitchy
Reason #5,612,345 for why you shouldn’t do LSD before a gig – Drunken Stepfather
Gay boxer Orlando Cruz got married! And since it was their special moment I will save my comments about their maitre d outfits for another day – Towleroad
Smelly Kuka gets in some special, intimate time with her husband and a bunch of paparazzi cameras – Hollywood Tuna
I wish I had that first tattoo on my ass – The Berry
Justin Bieber’s neighbors should just wait it out for a few months when he’ll have to move into Uncle Usher’s pool house because he spent all his money on South American whores, weed and tricked out Big Wheels – IDLYITW
Katy Perry’s glistening chichis made an appearance on a balcony in Miami today – Popoholic
Kim Zolciak’s twins-filled, 9-month baby dome is almost as big as her throbbing sense of delusion. In other words, HUUUUUUUGGGGGEEEEEEEEEE – ICYDK
Evan Peters is serving up some bubble butt Frankenstein hotness – OMG Blog
The Oscar statue is happy he has a sword to cover up his boner for the hot bitch that is Raquel Welch – HuffPo
Yes, I hate Kevin Spacey for getting to do shots with Maggie Smith and Helen Mirren – Popsugar
RiRi looks like a rejected Fly Girl – Just Jared
The Killing will. not. die. – Pajiba
Robbie Williams works the bleached bang you probably worked in the 7th grade – I’m Not Obsessed
This is how you do a trustfall when you really don’t give a shit – Videogum