RiRi As An Undead Cholita

November 1, 2013 / Posted by:

I guess the costume theme for The Difficult Brown’s past and present pieces was chola, because his current piece Karmakarmakamelonorhwatever Tran went as one (her chola name is La Dumbass) and so did RiRi (her chola name is La Tenhead).

RiRi spit up a huge load on Instagram of picture after picture of her and her friends as chola zombies on Halloween. When my eyeballs first scooted across these pictures, I thought RiRi was done up as a zombie Aaliyah and I didn’t know if this was going to make Drake come at her or try to hump her. RiRi snatched Detox’s black and white idea and mixed it with some Mi Vida Loca shit to give us a zombie chola straight out of My Crazy After Life (Mi Vida Después Loco). Three things: 1) I cannot label those brows as “exquisite cholita eyebrows,” because it looks like she made them with a regular, old, basic brow pencil and not a fresh Sharpie. ILLEGAL and that automatically makes this costume void and invalid. 2) Where is a hickey the size of Enrique Iglesias’ old mole on her cheek? A chola’s beauty mark is a cheek hickey. 3. THAT HAIRLINE. Those baby hairs look like dry and burnt scallop potatoes. Sad Girl and Mousie would never.

Pics: BadGalRiRi

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