Fucking like Kenyan marathon runners finally caught up to Olivia Wilde (born name: Olivia Jane Cockburn) and Jason Sudeikis. Olivia and Jason started boning two years ago, they got engaged almost a year ago and now they’re going to be somebody’s parents. Forever29-year-old Olivia and 38-year-old Jason always talk about how his fuck parts are always in her fuck parts, so I’m surprised that this is their first kid together. I would’ve thought that she would’ve pooped out more kids than Michelle Duggar by now. (Note: Olivia would have to poop them out since Jason is always in her snatch, duh.). But nope, this is the first baby they’ve made together. A source and their reps confirm to People that she will birth out a giant forehead with tiny legs and arms in a few months:
“They are incredibly happy,” says a source close to both. “They’re very excited to welcome a new member into their family.”
Reps for the couple confirm to PEOPLE that Wilde is pregnant with their first child.
Here’s to Olivia and Jason’s kid who will hopefully have the last name Cockburn-Sudeikis. And here’s to us nosy whores, because when Olivia has their kid and does an Instagram photo shoot with it, we can see if it looks anything like January Jones’ son. Congrats to us all.