A single tear of Botox dripped out of Tori Spelling’s eye and rolled down her shellacked clay face the other day when she cried to People about how she and her husband Dean McDermott are so broke that they don’t even have enough money to pay for his sperm tube to get snipped. But Dean tells UsWeekly that the words of woe that dribbled out of Tori’s 100% man-made lips weren’t true. Dean says that they’re fine financially and he could “probably” put together enough cash to stop the baby batter from shooting out of his peen. Dean said:
“Right now things are going well. I have several exciting projects in the works. Our show Dean and Tori’s Backyard Bash just re-aired to great ratings, I’ll be the new host of Chopped Canada and I have my first cookbook coming out — The Gourmet Dad, in the spring. Tori’s book (Spelling It Like It Is) just launched this week and things are good.
Could we afford a vasectomy? Probably. Was it a tougher time for us financially? Yea. For sure. That’s just the truth of it — it’s the nature of this business,” he explains of their woes in recent months.Sometimes things are awesome, sometimes they’re just not. But it’s about how we tackle things as a couple, as a family. And we do a pretty good job of that. Right now we have so many cool things going on — we’re in an uptick.”
You know how sometimes one of your relatives will call you and whine about how they’re so poor that they’re eating tomato soup made with ketchup packets they stole from McDonald’s and it’s their way of letting you know that they need a loan they have no intention of paying back? My guess is that Tori was doing the fame whore version of that. She cried to People about how she was broke so her multi-millionaire mom could send her a little wire, honey. I never really believed that Tori and Dean’s checking account was flatlining. Because if it was, do you think Dean would still be there? Dean took vows and those vows were: “‘Til death or a negative ATM balance does us part.” Bitch would’ve been out of there. And I doubt he’s going to get that vasectomy, because he never knows when the money will dry up and he’ll have to knock up his next sugar mama.