I regret bringing up Jessica Fletcher’s name yesterday, because now I have the creepy feeling I brought this story upon myself (some say you can summon a malevolent Angela Lansbury by saying ‘Jessica Fletcher’ three times in the mirror while a friend hums ‘Beauty and the Beast’). In a move reminiscent of a lazy kid who cleans his room by shoving everything under the bed, Deadline reports that NBC threw up its arms in a very I-Give-Up fashion and decided to reboot Murder, She Wrote with Angela Lansbury being replaced by Academy Award-winner Octavia Spencer.
In case you’re not familiar with Murder, She Wrote (and may god have mercy on your soul) it was about a mystery writer named Jessica Fletcher who starts solving murders in her small town of Cabot Cove, Maine. It aired for 12 seasons (because old people refuse to let anything go) and finally ended when Angela Lansbury got tired of living in a fake town with a higher murder rate than Honduras, and retired to sucking on Werther’s Originals all day long on the lanai.
But the real tragedy here isn’t that they’re updating Murder, She Wrote for a newer audience (@JessicaFletcher: OMG so many murders, I’ll never b unemployed again #blessed) it’s that they think Octavia Spencer is old enough to play a widowed retired English teacher. Octavia Spencer is only 43. In what shitty world would you look at someone like Octavia Spencer and think “Yeah, she can play an AARP member”. Oh right, Hollywood.
(Pic via Wenn)