Michael AssBender Is Not Going To Campaign For An Oscar

October 15, 2013 / Posted by:

Michael Fassbender will probably be nominated for a Best Supporting Actor Oscar for his performance in that movie that should change its title to “It’s For Business, Enslaver!, but sadly for all of us, he has no plans to pull a Melissa Leo by showing off his cleavage while wearing a fur shrug in For Your Consideration ads paid for by him. When Shame came out,┬áhe campaigned like Tracy Flick on meth for a Best Actor nomination and he didn’t get shit. So AssBender tells GQ that he’s not going to partake in that game this year.

“I’m going to be busy working. I just don’t really have time.

That’s just not going to happen, because I’ll be in New Zealand. I’ll be on the other side of the world. You know, I get it. Everybody’s got to do their job. So you try and help and facilitate as best you can. But I won’t put myself through that kind of situation again. It’s just a grind. And I’m not a politician. I’m an actor.”

This bitch is lying and he’s obviously campaigning by using reverse psychology on those hos. You know that while he’s working in New Zealand, his long dick is going to swim to Hollywood and campaign for him. It’s going to shake hands, schmooze, kiss cheeks and hand out “AssBender 4 Supporting Actor” pins. And on that note, excuse me while I Google “Whose dick do you have to suck to get on the Oscar voting committee?”

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