Besides today being National Coming Out Day (hint hint, Dean), I guess it’s also National Act Like It’s 2009 Again Day, because LeAnn Rimes’ ex-husband, dancer turned chef Dean Sheremet, talked to Access Hollywood about the day he found out that his wife was wrapping her luck dragon snatch around Eddie Cibrian’s wandering dick.
Dean (aka the Dollar Tree Jennifer Aniston) tells Access Hollywood that while LeAnn (aka the Dollar Tree Brad Pitt) was shooting Lifetime’s Northern Lights (aka the Dollar Tree Mr. & Mrs. Smith) with Eddie Cibrian (aka the Dollar Tree Angie Jolie) in Canada, she called him one day to tell him that UsWeekly might’ve gotten a hold of pictures of her mouth on Eddie’s mouth.
“I had a call…from LeAnn. She said, ‘Well, Us Weekly may or may not have a picture of me and Eddie kissing.’ I’m like, ‘Whoa! What do you mean may or may not have a picture? What does that mean?’ So then…it unfolded from there. The affair was, I mean, of all the things that I could have ever imagined would have happened, I never would have thought. I guess you have that assumption that the person that you’re with would never do something like that. How close we were, I just never saw it coming. If anyone would have seen it, I thought that I would have.”
Dean got married to a new chick in 2011 and says that he doesn’t hate the skanky Falkor:
“We don’t really talk. I have no animosity towards her. I have nothing but love for her, and I really wish her the best. But we don’t really talk that much. There’s not really a need to. I don’t really know what we would talk about.
I don’t know [if I] dodged a bullet… every relationship you learn from. I think that was my learning experience of what I needed to do to pick myself up and kind of do what I needed to do,” he said reflecting back. It’s hard to delineate where I stopped and LeAnn began. We were so intertwined, I was husband, I was father, I was manager. There were so many different roles and it was hard to juggle all of those things, when you just want to be in love with someone.”
No, Dean didn’t dodge a bullet. Dean dodged a squinty, bony, Twitter-obsessed fame whore chemical weapon of mass destruction who can’t stop wearing bikinis.
And since LeAnn Rimes’ brain is embedded with a WiFi chip that vibrates every time her name is mentioned on the Internet, she responded to Dean’s interview on Twitter:
I've got nothing! Over it, long gone, next… I mean really!? TGIF
— LeAnn Rimes Cibrian (@leannrimes) October 11, 2013
This bitch is right. How dare Dean Sorbetorwhatever get some attention and possibly a check for shitting at the mouth about a relationship that died years ago. How dare he! Doesn’t he know that only LeAnn can do that? I think that rule is written on the wall of her cave in Fantastica somewhere.