Kim Kartrashian Wanted To FedEx Her Titty Leche From Paris To Los Angeles

October 1, 2013 / Posted by:

The United States government hit the Command-Option-Esc command on all us bitches and slid down the inflatable JetBlue evacuation slide, but forget about that. Let’s talk about what really matters in this world: Kim Kartrashian’s titty leche.

Kim is in Paris with Kanye Kardashian for Paris Fashion Week, because it’s been much too long since they’ve posed together a genuine staged photo-op for attention and because he wanted to spend some alone time with her (aka do ass-to-ass with a double-sided dildo while she’s wearing a Kanye mask over her head). Since Kim has wet queefs for brains, she wanted to bring 3-month-old North West to Paris with her, but Kanye farted on that idea because no baby is going to take the attention away from him! Kanye is supposed to the belle of the Paris Fashion Week ball! Not some baby who can’t even say Givenchy right. Can you believe North can’t even say Givenchy right? Are we sure she’s Kanye’s daughter? Call Maury!

So then Kim came up with the brilliant plan to either FedEx her chichi milk to North’s mouth or make an assistant deliver it. Some source told Radar:

“Kim really wanted to take Nori to Paris but Kanye insisted that it wasn’t a good idea because of his issues with photographers. He thought it was too dangerous. He also wanted Kim all to himself for a few days. He said they needed to spend time together as a couple away from her family.

Kim had wanted to continue breast feeding for another two months. She considered taking a breast pump with her to Paris and having either an assistant flying the milk back to L.A. or shipping it back by FedEx. Kanye thought that was ludicrous, and as usual he got his way.”

Oh, please. Like we’re really supposed to believe that Kim doesn’t have thirty freezers full of her frozen tit milk because she heard that breastfeeding will melt away some of the chunk and so she’s constantly pumping her way to skinny. Besides, even if Kim doesn’t have thirty freezers full of her frozen tit milk, Pimp Mama Kris’ got this. Cut to PMK winking at the camera as Baby North sucks the hot milk of Lucifer out of her tete.

In other Kardashishit, Kim behaved like the humble, down-to-earth whore she is by Instagramming all the free luxury baby clothes she’s gotten from designers.

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What a beautiful thing to Instagram to the 99% on Government Shut Down Day! I hope bitch follows up this touching series by Instramming pictures of all these designer clothes after North has shit, barfed and drooled all over them.

Here’s Kim sort of wearing normal people clothes in Paris this morning.

Pics: Splash

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