Wonks Won’t Be Blamed For Leading Nick Carter’s Nostril To The Bad Shit

September 26, 2013 / Posted by:

The only way to look at that picture is to look at it while listening to some Sarah McLachlan, because that is a PSA-worthy sad glare for help.

Nick Carter writes in his memoirs Facing the Music and Living to Talk About It that getting with Parasite Hilton in 2004 was the worst thing he could do for himself, because all kinds of different STD warts sealed his dick lips shut, his peen won’t talk to him anymore and he’ll forever be on file with the CDC. No, he didn’t say, but did say that she was toxic for him, because he’s an addict and she can shoot an 8-ball out of her twat anytime you need a little pick-me-up. Nick wrote in his book:

“Paris was the worst person in the world for me to hook up with. We had the partying in common. It just is what it is. That’s life. You go through, you have exes and you have past situations. But I don’t fault her for anything.”

Wonky was highly offended by this, because she’s a pristine gardenia who doesn’t even know what coke looks like! Wonks farted out this skid mark to Access Hollywood:

“I don’t believe I was a negative influence on Nick, we dated for a very short period of time almost 10 years ago and when we met he was already a successful pop star, I’m pretty sure that was the only thing influencing him at the time. I’m glad he got help for his problems and wish him all the best.”

The truth is, Wonks has a point and when Wonks has a point, I know her publicist made that point for her while she forced her boy toy to snort molly out of her cooze.

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