Taylor Momsen Doesn’t Have Raccoon Eyes Anymore

September 10, 2013 / Posted by:

In case you forgot what Taylor Momsen looked like after sneaking onto a campground to smear ten pounds of charcoal dust over her eyes, here’s what her signature deranged raccoon eyes looked like a couple of years ago:

taylormomsenracooneyes2013

And now she doesn’t have them anymore. I don’t know how she got those thirty layers of Sharpie gunk, tar and gunpowder off of her eyes. I thought that the only way to get all that shit off of her face would be to remove her goddamn skin. She must’ve went down to Home Depot, rented a dozen sandblasters, picked up a few of my cousins in the parking lot and got them to blast that mess off of her eyes. It looks like after they chipped the paint off her eyes, they chipped away some of her nose. Bitch got rid of her raccoon eyes and half of her nose. She looks like a completely different person now. She looks like a Russian art student/Palmer Girl impersonator who makes extra money posing for pictures used in those ~Ukrainian~ bride e-mail scams.

Well, one thing didn’t change. She still looks like she’s full of rainbows and kitten kisses and lives a life full of sunshiney happiness.

Here’s Taylor with Kelly Rutherford and Wonky McValtrex at the Alice + Olivia presentation in NYC yesterday.

Pics: Splash, Wenn.com

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