Insert ten coliseums full of echoing cackles here.
Kanye West is still straining every muscle in his gold-leafed anus to turn trash heap heffa Kim Kartrashian into some kind of high fashion icon and he got Kunty Karl, Carine Roitfeld and his favorite snuggle time partner Riccardo Tisci to help him make it happen. Kim is the brain dead child beauty queen to Kanye’s crazy stage mother. Carine put a knocked up Kim on the cover of the third issue of her CR Fashion Book and the inside spread was art directed by Riccardo Tisci and shot by Kunty Karl. In almost every picture, you can hear Riccardo and Kunty Karl screaming, “I HATE THIS TRICK!” If every picture tells a story, then in every picture Riccardo and Karl are telling us the story of how they gave up.
I love it all and I really love that picture above. Bitch looks so stupid. She looks like a pregnant OctoMom as a slutty mime from the 90s. It looks like she’s lying on a black wheelbarrow and that “HUH?” look in her face tells me that Kunty Karl asked her what 2 + 2 is.
And honestly, here’s the best picture of them all:
It was really brave of Kim to show us the rhinestone mask that Kanye makes her wear when she wants to kiss him. The secret to their relationship is Kim wearing a mask that Kanye can see his own sparkling reflection in.
And if you’re behind on your eye roll exercises today, here’s a quote from Carine that will help you to catch you up: “This is not something for a gossip magazine that goes into the trash. This is a magazine that is a collector’s item.” Yes, it’s the perfect piece for any comedy memorabilia collector.