FETUS FIGHT: Justin Bieber Gets Attacked In A Toronto Club

I don’t know who’s winning this picture more: the dude all the way to the left in the orange plaid shirt who’s making an “Ooooooh, fetus is about to get whooped” face or Justin Bieber who looks like a scared first grader whose ball just rolled onto the older kids side of the playground.

Justin Bieber turned from the hardest member of the jungle gym gang known as the Wild Kidz into a scared-as-shit toddler this morning in Toronto when he was attacked at a club. TMZ says that the Beibs was partying in the daycare section VIP section of the club, but he got bold and decided to hang out with the regulars. As soon as he left his section, some dude charged him, grabbed his shirt and tried to pull him down to the floor. Kinky. Because the Biebs would run off to his mommy if a fly flinched at him, his security took care of the guy. Security pulled the dude down to the floor and that’s when Justin got hard again and started kicking at the dude. Nothing is more badass than a toddler screaming “hold me back, bro” and kicking at a dude who’s being held down by his security guards.

After the Biebs showed that trick not to mess with him (and his team of huge ass bodyguards), he left the club right away, because all the scary excitement made him shit in his diaper pants and he needed to be changed. THUG LYFE!