Afternoon Crumbs

Do Miley, RiRi and Lana Del Meh go to the same fashion swap parties? – Moe Jackson

Tracy Anderson talks about Goopy Paltrow’s long butt. It’s times like this when I wish that words didn’t exist. – Lainey Gossip

This list is incomplete without one of Tan Mom’s songs – The Berry

Khloe Kartrashian and Lamar Odom are not getting divorced for the millionth time, but I wish that I could divorce the image of her suffocating wookie pocket – The Superficial

Shane from The L-Word, is that you? – Celebitchy

Shakira wearing garbage bag shorts on SELF Magazine – Drunken Stepfather

I love a good gay sailor marriage proposal – Towleroad

Gia Allemand from Jake Pavelka’s season of The Bachelor died of an apparent suicide – Reality Tea

Olivia Wilde’s dress looks exactly like the wall screen my high school French teacher had in her classroom – Popoholic

I’m not sure what’s melting faster in the sun: Bethenny Frankel’s cheek or chichi implants? – Hollywood Tuna

Since Kim Kartrashian is never going to weigh 115 pounds, that means she’ll never leave the house. Congratulations to humanity! – ICYDK

Cisco Adler got a perm – SOW

And as I type this, a tattoo artist is putting this exact tattoo on Miley Cyrus’ crotch – Tosh.0

Helen Mirren totally has a subscription to Brazzers – HuffPo

Happy Hump Day, here’s some ginger nipples – Popsugar

In case you forgot what Lady CaCa looked like naked since it’s been about a half-a-second since you’ve seen her naked – Just Jared

“What a good career move for Laura Prepon!” said not one pair of lips – Jezebel

Elvis’ granddaughter is back with Alex Petmyfur – I’m Not Obsessed

(Pic via Pacific Coast News)