Correction: A side-eye from anyone ALWAYS says everything.
Johnny Depp is in Japan now to try to get people to see Disney’s biggest international piece of shit of 2013, The Longer Ranger, and he greeted his fans at the airport in Tokyo today. And by “fans,” I don’t mean that side-eye throwing little girl who speaks for all of us. That “Why is this bronzed ball of grease in a jacked-up outfit trying to get me to see his turd of a movie?” side-eye is taking me higher.
Johnny also brought his piece Amber Heard and his two kids to Tokyo with him. He probably brought Amber, because he needs somebody to babysit his kids while he’s out in Tokyo trolling for some cop toes to suck on. At least that’s what his hankies tell me and the Gay Hanky Code never lies.