Alec Baldwin Approves!

Last week, 50 Cent was charged with domestic violence after he allegedly kicked his ex-girlfriend and the mother of one of his kids, Daphne Joy, during a fight at her condo in L.A. 50 Cent denied getting violent with Daphne and said that he was never arrested. Just as Two Quarters denied that he freaked out on Daphne Joy, screen shots of old texts messages magically appeared in Radar’s inbox and they showed him freaking out on his 16-year-old son Marquise. During the 1-hour-long text fight, 50 filled his son’s eyes with fatherly words of poetry like “I need a blood test cause that dick sucking bitch you call mom was fucking the hole time” and “You are your mother’s child. I don’t have a son anymore.” Alec Baldwin just naturally smiled for the first time since forever, because it warms his heart seeing a graduate from his school of parenting doing him proud.

Radar says that 50 Cent’s text meltdown happened a few months ago and it started when he went to visit Marquise. 50 accused Marquise of pretending to not be home when he knocked on the door and Marquise accused 50 of lying. Here’s the entire transcript of their father/son text battle and these texts are more entertaining if you picture Marquise laughing and pointing at 50 from a window as he watches his dad lose it in the front yard.

50 Cent: Hey I’m outside the house at the front door. I came to the front door then lights went off. What’s up?

Marquise: U lying u outside? Lol. Lol u fronting.

50 Cent: I saw you looking out the window good luck in life. Your gonna need it.

Marquise: Lol u fronting hard body now, how u going to see me when I’m in the basement lmao

50 Cent: Fuck you. You are your mother child.

Marquise: Lol why would u lie about that lol

50 Cent: I need a blood test cause that dick sucking bitch you call mom was fucking the hole time. I don’t think your funny at all. I drove out here for nothing.

Marquise: Pops ur trippen now, why u won’t been get one u had 16 years lol, I know u lying bc u didt even call me too go outside

50 Cent: Are you fucking crazy I don’t have time to play boy. I told you I would come see you. I came motherfucker start turning lights out and looking threw the blinds. Are you fucking stupid. You had me drive over there why do you think I needed a address shit head. I saw the lights go out then some one playing in the blinds and there no party going on. Fuck you to. You your mother and your sister fuck all of yal.

Marquise: I might dumb, come thru then, no need to get upset. Stop by and say hello too ur son.

50 Cent: What the fuck are you taking about I’m not fucking with you after this I leave Atlanta in the morning.

Marquise: So come thru then

50 Cent: Fuck you

Marquise: No need for all that

50 Cent: You are bigger enough to know better so fuck you stop texting me

Marquise: Ight

50 Cent: Tell your mother she won. She has you and ill make another. I will have nothing to do with you. Don’t text me ever again.

Marquise: U keep texting me lol

50 Cent: It’s cool I will never go out of my way again. You disrespectful little mother fucker.

Marquise: Lol u never do I don’t know not that doesn’t even call there son for his birthday. Or get him a gift for his b-day or for Christmas.

50 Cent: You are your mothers son. I don’t have a son anymore.Fuck you all you want is a gift. Like your mother and your ungrateful sister. Delete my number. You never call what the fuck I’m suppose to call you to give you something sorry.

Marquise: Welp if u feel that way, I don’t about no gift it’s the thought that means the most, remember this money ain’t everything. I’m tired of calling u, why don’t call me and please can’t wait to hear this excuse

50 Cent: Good luck with you life man. I tried to come talk to you. You din’t have to have me come all the way out there if you don’t to see me you little ass hole. I don’t have to make a excuse for anything. I’m a grown ass man boy. You talking about money ain’t everything. Your right but when you don’t have any your gonna understand why I work so hard. I’m done texting you delete my number.

Marquise: Thank u, and u know dang well u ain’t come out here too see, but if that’s what u want to stick then I’m sorry, and I know why u work hard, ok, god bless

50 Cent: Are you fucking stupid

Marquise’s mom Shaniqua Tompkins was on the failed TLC reality show Starter Wives and 50 Cent tried to stop her from being on it because he didn’t want all his shit aired on basic cable.

Marquise clearly won that text battle, because you know every time he typed “LOL” 50 Cent’s ass lips exploded as he punched the screen of his phone. Nothing will light up a bitch’s ass like a sarcastic LOL. You know, reading these texts make me wish that I had a kid, because can you really say that you’ve lived a complete and full human life if you’ve never texted the words “Fuck you! Delete my number!” to your teenage son? I don’t think so.