You’ve Heard This Before: Stacy Keibler’s Contract Expired

July 7, 2013 / Posted by:

The Sun said a few months ago that Stacy Keibler’s record-breaking run as George Clooney’s award show escort had come to an end and her days of wearing borrowed designer gowns and millions of dollars worth of jooree were over. But then a day after The Sun’s story came out, Stacy and George killed the rumors with a good old-fashioned STUNT QUEEN photo-op in Germany. Thousands of cocktail waitresses and E-list models got the sads, because their dream of smoking a joint with Brad Pitt backstage at the Oscars was crushed. But those cocktail waitresses and E-list models better start sending their pictures and resumes (Pro tip: If you want to get to the top of the pile, add “black belt in strap-on wielding” to the special skills section of your resume) to George Clooney’s Award Show Escort Agency, because The Sunday People (via The Daily Mail) says that he and Stacy are over for real this time.

The Sunday People’s source says that Stacy and George didn’t spend the Fourth of July together, which TOTALLY means that he has cut her from his payroll. George and Stacy haven’t been photographed together in almost three months and the source says that he’s backing away from her ass:

“It’s not like George and Stacy couldn’t find time to get together if they really wanted to. George is quietly backing away from the relationship. It’s always the same. As soon as he feels a woman is getting too close he pulls back.”

I’m sure George and Stacy will kill this rumor by skipping hand-in-hand down the ho stroll in front of all the paps they called. But if George did pink slip Stacy, then I say good riddance to his ass. Stacy doesn’t need George anymore now that she’s landed the job of her career as the host of Supermarket Superstar (which sadly isn’t a reboot of Supermarket Sweep)!

When Supermarket Superstar sweeps the Emmy nominations, Stacy can hire George to be her red carpet escort for once. And if George really did shred Stacy’s contract and needs another trophy escort, he should hire that peroxide beauty in the background of that picture. But honestly, he probably can’t afford her.

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