Open Post: Hosted By Courtney Stodden’s Natural-Looking Titty Balls

July 3, 2013 / Posted by:

So that’s why it felt like an angelic porn iguana was blowing an air kiss across my dirtstar last night” said Charles Bronson from heaven.

While holding her creepy-faced pedo husband’s hand, the delicate and demure Courtney Stodden showed off her new beautifully constructed iguana tits at The Hard Rock (hard rock is right) in Hollywood last night. Courtney Stodden is proving that you don’t need to pay a plastic surgeon thousands of dollars to get naturally-looking implants. You can give a PennySaver plastic surgeon a hand job and an autographed picture of your husband and he’ll shove two basketballs full of Fix-A-Flat into your chest and he’ll do it in his non-air conditioned studio apartment in The Valley. Who wouldn’t want tits that look like two melting goiters?

And Courtney’s new 99 Cent Store tits go perfectly with her recycled weave and baby powder face. I can finally say that Mordor’s answer to Shauna Sand has finally been found!

Pics: Splash, Pacific Coast News

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