While standing in the middle of a set that looked like the chandelier section of a Lamps Plus, Mimi performed at the BET Awards last night and some say she earned a “sashay away” from RuPal for the lazy lip-synching show she gave. When hos accused Mimi of moving her lips to a track during the American Idol finale, she said “absolutely not, darlings,” but she hasn’t yet said anything about last night’s performance. But she doesn’t have to…
Anybody who can see things and hear things at the same time knows that the Unicornie Butterfly Rainbow Empress was lip-synching and that’s not what offends me. I’m offended that Mimi can’t lip-synch worth a damn. It’s like her sense of hearing is on a 3-second delay. A drunk deaf seal high on novocaine is probably better at lip-synching than Mimi is. Brit Brit would beat Mimi in a Lip-Synch For Your Life and Brit Brit just throws a piece of gum in her mouth, chews and hopes that the words match up with her moving mouth (or not, Brit don’t care).
Mimi lip-synching last night makes sense, though. Miguel was on stage and whenever Miguel’s on stage there’s more than a 50% chance that one or more of the tricks in the audience will be decapitated by him. If Mimi sang live, even more lives would’ve been in danger. As soon as she let out a high-pitched, 450-octave hyena screech, the chandeliers and the mic would’ve shattered, sending slivers of glass flying into the audience. Bitches would’ve gotten shanked. Mimi didn’t sing live, because she cares about the health and well being of her lambs. That shit was a safety precaution.
If you can’t see the YouTube above or want to see a video that doesn’t look like it was shot on a water-damaged hand crank camera, click here.