Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

Yes, that was an original 90210 star you heard in the bathroom having sex very loudly the other night with someone who is not their significant other. Very loudly. Did I mention it was loud? (CDAN)

It wasn’t Jennie Garth, because I figure her for the prude-ish type who won’t even put her bare hands on a public bathroom faucet let alone take her chonies off in a stall. It wasn’t Shannen Doherty, because I didn’t see anything on the news recently about dozens of people who temporarily went deaf from listening to the powerful and beautiful sounds of a dark angel orgasming. It wasn’t Tori Spelling, because a Sleestak’s mating moans sounds nothing like a human’s mating moans. I’ll throw out Luke Perry and Jason Priestly too.

So I’ll guess it was either Ian Ziering, Brian Austin Green or Gabrielle Carteris? I’ll go with Gabrielle Carteris, because you know she’s a down low freak.

This comedic actor might want to think twice about how he expresses himself when it comes to imitating people. He was out to dinner with a group of friends when the discussion turned to the Trayvon Martin/ George Zimmerman trial.

The actor – who may have had a drink or two – loudly referred to one of the witnesses as “precious”, called her “retarded”, and then proceeded to do an impromptu routine as the witness. He used a variety of exaggerated hand and facial gestures to imitate the witness’ performance on the stand.

While he known as a comedic actor, not all of the patrons in the restaurant were amused by his routine. (Blind Gossip)

You really can’t take Michael Richards anywhere! Or maybe this is Tyler Perry’s foolish ass. I wouldn’t be surprised if Tyler Perry is begging Lifetime to let him play her in the Travyton Martin biopic that they’re obviously going to make.

This great looking B-/C+ list mostly television actor who missed his shot at a move to the A list when his network show was canceled last year has no idea that his B+ list model/actress wife has been stepping out with this A list celebrity who is known for being really skinny and formerly married to an A list diva. (CDAN)

My brain isn’t farting out any guesses for the TV actor and wife, but the skinny A-lister is obviously Marc Anthony. Skeletor’s supposedly Panthor-sized dick really brings in the ladies.

This trainwreck of a celebrity has been telling people that she is now pregnant. She somehow managed to do this while in rehab. Not sure if this is a ploy on her part, or if she is actually pregnant. (CDAN)

I don’t know what would make the heads of every CPS social worker blow off faster: a knocked up LiLo or a knocked up Brooke Mueller?