Princess Charlene Of Monaco Showed Up To The Swedish Royal Wedding By Herself

June 8, 2013 / Posted by:

Princess Madeleine of Sweden married American peasant Christopher O’Neill in a lavish (Note: Anybody who writes about a royal wedding is required to use the word “lavish” when describing said royal wedding or they will be sent to the guillotine.) wedding that brought out several royals of the world (not including Prince Hot Ginge, the Duchess of Alba and the Empress of Lucite Shauna Sand). There were so many tiaras and sashes that it looked like man night at the Scientology Centre (or like another one of Mimi’s vow renewal ceremonies at Disneyland). One of the royals who came out for the open bar was Princess Charlene of Monaco. She showed up without her captor/husband Prince Pierced Dick.

Prince Albert couldn’t make it because he was busy attending to official royal business like stuffing his mouth with call girl pussy. I don’t even think Princess Charlene forwarded him the Evite because his loud snoring would totally distract her while she’s trying to hump on her side piece in the same hotel suite. (Nothing dries a pussy up like a snoring Prince Albert.) So she went to Stockholm alone!

People says that Princess Madeleine wore a dress by H&M, catering was provided by the Ikea cafeteria, the wedding cake was made by The Swedish Chef from from The Muppet Show and an ABBA cover band performed at the reception. No, none of that is fact. The truth is she wore a dress by Valentino and guests sucked Swedish Fish off of Alexander Skarsgard’s naked body.

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