Jennifer Love Hewitt Is Officially Engaged Now

Yesterday, Jennifer Love Hewitt confirmed the rumor that the whole good old-fashioned “sticking pin-holes in the condom” trick worked and she’s got a baby growing in her womb. Today, Jennifer Love Hewitt confirms the rumors that she’s engaged to her baby father and boyfriend of 15 months Brian Hallisay. JLove has been engaged approximately five thousand times before, but I’m sure this time is like the first time.

JLove told UsWeekly that Brian proposed to her while they were on vacation in Europe last month. It was very romantic. JLove dropped a Euro on the ground and when Brian got on his knees to pick it up,  she pulled out the three engagement rings she’s been saving, slid all three of them on her finger and screamed, “Yes! Yes! Get up off your knees, you fool! I said YES!” Before Brian could let a “huh,” JLove was already on the phone with the wedding planning team that operates out of her basement to tell them that Operation Wedding Impossible is a go (again)!

But if history repeats itself, then JLove will end their engagement and accuse Brian of never loving her when he says, “You choose,” after she asks him if the stripe on their monogrammed napkins for their first of twelve rehearsal dinners should be white or beige. “Why do you hate?!” is what JLove will scream as she glues rhinestones on her crotch.