Miley Can’t Stop

June 3, 2013 / Posted by:

Now that Miley Cyrus is over 18, she should retire her Pedo Bear back-up dancers. They just don’t have the shock value they used to. And no, I don’t know how I feel about her “slutty white girl chola aerobics instructor” look either.

Miley is free of that Liam Hemsworth ho, so she’s going to spend her summer dancing on molly and stuff. Miley released her new single “We Can’t Stop” (more like, “Please Stop, Miley!“) and it sounds like something Gwen Stefani and RiRi came up with after they numbed their brains with weed and Sizzurp. It’s the perfect slow jam for Billy Ray Cyrus to grind to on the family stripper pole in den.

Miley yodels about strip clubs, God and her haters all in one verse, so I won’t be surprised if this song is chosen as the new National Anthem of ‘Murica!

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