Miley Cyrus And Liam Hemsworth Are Really, Really Done This Time

May 29, 2013 / Posted by:
Billy Ray Cyrus’ Taco Party Pack For One Party is officially a Taco Party Pack For Two Party, because Miley Cyrus is sitting on the kitchen counter right next to him, crying lonely tears into her Corn Pops and tacos. Because UsWeekly is co-signing Page Six’s claim that Miley and her piece of four years Liam Hemsworth are done forever. 

Liam’s brothers, Thor and the other one, supposedly intervened on his relationship in April, trying to convince him that the porcupine haired chipmunk was no good for him. (In other words, they screamed at him, “For the love of Odin, don’t bind us to that trash family forever!“) Miley and Liam briefly pressed pause on their wedding plans and Miley spent more intimate time with her bong than she did with Liam. Some source says that it’s officially, officially over now.

Everybody better board up their windows and brace themselves, because we all know what’s going to happen next. Miley is going to get with Justin Bieber, get knocked up and unleash a terrifying chimpunk-beaver hybrid on the world. Actually, don’t bother boarding up your windows, because chipmunk-beaver hybrids can chew through a piece of wood from a mile away. We’re all screwed.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Los Angeles, January Jones is doing this:

Score another one for January!

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