Things That Aren’t Believable: Jennifer Aniston As A Stripper

May 23, 2013 / Posted by:

When peen-headed Vin Diesel cried about how Hollywood is harder on men than women when it comes to body image, I said some shit about how Hollywood is the land of unrealistic everything and most Hollywood movies are not real life. Here’s another example to throw on that pile.

The red band (aka NSFWish) trailer for We’re the Millers came out yesterday and it had a couple of scenes of Jennifer Aniston stripping in a club and another scene of Jennifer Aniston stripping in a barn (Side note: “Strippers in a barn” is basically the theme for Trace Cyrus’ future bachelor party). I get why Jennifer Aniston wanted to play a stripper. When she’s not crocheting boleros for her Beanie Babies, she’s doing tequila shots off of Chelsea Handler’s leather-covered stomach and when she’s not doing that, she’s working out (or getting lunchtime lipo). So, since she works that hard on her body, she figures that she might as well show her ass off. I get it. But my neighbor’s 12-year-old, obese cat whose got a field of dingles on her butt would make a more believable stripper than Jennifer Aniston does.

But I do appreciate the tribute to TLC in the trailer….

…and the tribute to Cisco Adler’s nutsack.

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