I know that what you really needed today was a video of come-to-life subway seat stain Ke$hit pissing into a cut off plastic water bottle before drinking it. On last night’s Ke$ha: My Crazy Life, a co-production between the CDC and MTV, Ke$hit’s friend tells her that drinking your own pee pee is supposed to be good for you, so she decides to do it.
You know, I call SHE-NAN-AH-GANS! I contacted someone at the CDC (no, I didn’t) and they told me (no, they didn’t) that Ke$ha’s pee is the color of battery acid, smoke wafts off of it and when she pees, you can hear the high-pitched screeches from her crotch crabs as they get burned alive. That’s not her piss. That’s obviously Crystal Light lemonade. You so not edgy, Ke$hit.