During an American Airlines flight from Los Angeles to JFK, the spirit of Whitney Houston took over the body of a passenger who couldn’t stop singing Dolly Parton’s “I Will Always Love You (in the style of Nippy).” Another passenger told CNN that the song “I Will Always Love You” is forever embedded deep into their brain, because Nippy 2.0 would not stop telling the entire plane through song that she loved them. Nippy 2.0 did not stop spitting out tattered musical notes from her mouth and it got so annoying that they had to stop in Kansas City to hand her over to the police. (Note to self: If I’m ever on a flight from LAX to JFK and want to eat some Kansas City ribs, just start singing some Whitney Houston shit until they escort me off the plane.)
A rep for the Kansas City International Airport told CNN, “The passenger was detained, not arrested, and then released pending further investigation by the TSA (Transportation Safety Administration) and federal air marshals. I can confirm that she was singing ‘I Will Always Love You’ as she was escorted off the plane.”
The rep didn’t say if the passenger went full Whitney by screaming “BOBAAAAAAY B” in the hallways before asking hos to pop her doody bubble.
The passenger told authorities that she has diabetes and that’s why she freaked out. If you’re side-eyeing that “diabetes” excuse, let me side-eye you right back. Because one time my grandmother’s blood sugar levels got low and she opened the kitchen cabinets and started throwing food everywhere. So it happens.
And since when can you not take pictures on the plane? When a plane makes an emergency landing in Kansas City because a mile high songbird won’t stop belting out a Dolly Parton song, everyone’s going to pull out their phones to document it. Doesn’t that flight attendant know what world she lives in?