Open Post: Hosted By The Always Coy Porn Iguana

May 8, 2013 / Posted by:

While wearing a child’s ballerina dress as a top and exquisitely crafted jean panties usually seen on a low-level lot lizard, Courtney Stodden slithered into Kitson Kids in West Hollywood yesterday, because the children really needed a lesson in what elegance and demurity (I don’t know if that’s a word, but that’s never stopped me before) truly is. While there, the porn iguana also bought herself a new pair of children’s shorts and a few stuffed animals to shove into her padded bra, because she wasn’t stuffed enough.

And the only person besides me who’s more confused about Courtney Stodden needing a bodyguard is her bodyguard.

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