Blaming slavery and paying off a huge chuck of her debt to the IRS wasn’t enough to keep Lauryn Hill out of the chokey and she will have to spend time behind a prison cell for not paying taxes on the $1.5 million she made from 2005 to 2007. On top of the three month prison sentence, a judge in Newark, New Jersey also sentenced Lauryn to three months of house arrest and 9 months of supervised release. Expect Lauryn Hill to start begging for coins on Kickstarter, because she also has to pay a $60,000 fine.
Last year, Lauryn pleaded guilty to not paying her taxes from 2005 to 2007 and yesterday was sentencing day. Lauryn reportedly signed a $1 million deal with Sony and took out a loan for $650,000 to pay all the taxes, penalties and interest she owes. AP says that days before her sentencing, Lauryn paid more than $900,000, but the U.S. Attorney’s Office says that she still owes a lot of money for penalties and interest. Before Lauryn’s sentence, she read (and sometimes rapped) a statement where she blamed slavery.
“I am a child of former slaves who had a system imposed on them. I had an economic system imposed on me. I sold 50 million units [and] now I’m up here paying a tax debt. If that’s not likened to slavery, I don’t know what is.”
And Lauryn went on to talk about what happened to her after she left the music industry…
“There were veiled threats, there was blacklisting. I was told, ‘That’s how it goes, it comes with the territory.’ I came to be perceived as a cash cow and not a person. When people capitalize on a persona, they forget there is a person in there.”
The judge wasn’t moved and he told Lauryn to turn herself in by July 8th.
So either one of two things is going to happen by July 8th. Lauryn Hill will check herself into federal prison and she’ll meet her cell mate who is hopefully a serious brown aficionado and will tame her wild eyebrow situation with tweezers (or if they can’t have tweezers, wooden chopsticks). Or Lauryn Hill will escape to Canada and join the anti-Star Whackers league with Randy Quaid.