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Judith The Mommy To Be Doll

Based on her shower puff bangs of polyester hair, her hot acid wash ensemble and her white Keds, I really thought Judith came sliding out of the 1980s’ neon, acid wash birth canal. But Judith is from 1991, so I guess she’s just some tardy-to-the-party 1980s afterbirth that came sliding out in the 1990s. Judith sort of looked like Barbie, but she didn’t come from Mattel. I’m thinking that Judith was one of Ken’s side pieces from the wrong side of the tracks and after she got knocked up with his child, that evil bitch Barbie had her banished to the 99 Cent store.

For their “They Actually Made That!” series, Hi-Fructose Magazine covered Judith and showed us how she gives birth to Ken’s love child:

Stop yourself if you’re about to shout, “That doll is telling lies! That’s not how babies are born.” Because that’s exactly how Posh Beckham gives birth. The doctors pull the lid off her stomach, pull the spring-loaded baby out and push her stomach in until it’s flat. And “spring-loaded baby” really needs to be someone’s band name.

via Boing Boing